I dreamed last night that I was sitting in a boat. It was like a canoe but maybe a little bit wider. Strangely, I was posing. Then I could see why. Someone was taking my picture from over my shoulder. We were trying to set it up so that it looked like the boat was in the water.
At a certain point, I thought, “What the heck am I doing? Either the boat is in the water, and it’s a real picture . . . .” Of course, if the boat were really in the water, we wouldn’t be able to take the picture at all.
So I had to decide whether or not I wanted to go somewhere . . . or whether I wanted to pretend to be going somewhere. Just to have my picture taken!
I remember feeling a moment of shame, as if I had just discovered a hidden prankster stowing away in my heart. I prayed, then and there, that the boat could be instead pushed away from the shore and into the water. My dream self was telling me that it could no longer stand pretending to be in the river.
It wanted real self-discovery.