Today I can see clearly how working with the mind was never going to be a long-term thing. The mind had to fool me, it had to pretend to be the soul, it had to promise to take me to my goal. But it knew all along that its lies would eventually come to light, that it would eventually be unraveled.
The mind skirted, it lied, it evaded, all to stay undetected. It used the silent treatment to confuse me, gaslighting to make me feel guilty, anger to keep me meek and mild. But I was always going to walk away, because I was never going to get what I really wanted.
I was never going to find happiness with the mind.
And here’s where it gets great. You have to leave, you can’t put up with it any more, and it’s given that the mind is going to play the victim card. I just passed three years in this hell-hole, so I can tell you all about it. It’s the mind’s last chance to hold you, by playing the victim, and believe you me, he will.
The mind couldn’t be loved for his own attributes, so he has to lie to keep you near him. He had to lie to get you to love him, he had to lie to scare you about leaving him, he had to lie even about why you left him, and now, as a final blow, he has to lie and say it was all your fault that the relationship ended.
And it’s perfect like this, because it’s built into the whole game. And that’s why so few people get out of this toxic relationship: they can’t face the avalanche of sh#t that comes from a part of you that you really trusted to get you along in life. You raise you hand to say, “I want more than this,” and the mind tries to silence you with bully tactics and terror.
Anyway, it’s a done deal, it’s a fait accompli for each one of us. Finally I can say: there is absolutely no doubt : every single one of us will one day outgrow the mind, overcome our conditioning, throw off the chains, and reclaim our True Glory.
The only question is, how deep will the furrows be from your fingers scraping as you’re dragged out of your prison?