Resisting the Inner Bully

I don’t think I’m alone here. We all eventually find ourselves underneath a time/money bully, some boss who really puts the screws to us, making us feel that both are limited. They’re not.

I got to the point, one day, when I just couldn’t take it anymore. I thought it was about other people, but I was really talking to myself here. I was discovering the ways in which I withheld love from myself because I wasn’t the rich person with lots of time that I thought I should be.

I was so stuck in the victim mentality that I had no hope of ever getting out. And I don’t think it’s a mistake. I think a lot of us have to go through this. We have to learn to stand up for ourselves–listen to how absurd that sounds!–we have to protect ourselves from ourselves, from our conditioning, from the part that says, “You’re nobody. You don’t deserve to have enough time. You don’t deserve to have enough money.”

Eventually we start to see that there is no real shortage of time and money, it’s just a mentality, an energy we’ve kept with us for too long. And because we have this lack mentality, we must rebel against it.

Now, the real irony is that we can’t rebel against it until we know something better, and we often don’t have enough time, space and energy to find that better something. We find it during a vacation, or a sickness, or some strange moment in time in which we’re liberated from the system that’s crushing us… and we rebel against going back.

We finally say, “I don’t care what it takes, but I’m not going back to that system anymore.”

That’s the day we finally start to rebel against the real enemy: our own inner bully.

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