Being desired = fear of being ugly.
Being busy = fear of being useless.
Being popular = fear of not being loved.
Being rich = fear of not having self-worth.
Desires reveal fears, those fears that keep us endlessly running… towards new desires. We’re forever trying to resolve a problem that’s A) non-existent, and B) in the other direction — until we exhaust ourselves. Then somehow the world turns us around and we’re finally ready to go within. As the Peter Gabriel song says: “Digging in the dirt, find the places we got hurt.”
At a certain point — no longer able to paper over our dissatisfaction — we’re forced to look back at where, when and how we accepted that original fear as true… usually sometime in our early adolescence.
The good news, my friends, is that your fear was completely unfounded: you do have beauty, you are valued, you are lovable. With courage, follow that desire in the opposite direction, back to the spark that set you off on this long, impossible quest. Then accept your error, drop the fear… and forgive yourself.
It was all just a simple, childish misunderstanding… and it only happened a moment ago. Free of the original thorn, we’re free from these bottomless desires. In short…